2020 madness

June 20, 2020

How is everyone doing? Paul and I are managing, not loving it but grateful for so much. Every day I am thankful for my partner, for our home and pets and friends and food to eat. I am even more aware of my white privilege and am committed to being anti-racist in every way possible.

But the truth of this time is that the stress is incredible and we all feel it. Even though I’m not marching in the streets in the US I am there in spirit. On the one hand I can feel the change coming and on the other hand I am horrified where we are. And yes, I still am part of the “we” even though I don’t live in the US now.

For those of us living away from our home countries it is hard to watch it all in horror and fear for those we know and love. I feel like everyone’s mother and no one’s mother. I feel stripped of my family by the pandemic and the unrest. When will I ever be able to see them again? I can’t imagine flying to see them or entering into communities dealing with increasing numbers of people sick with the virus. And this is just the first wave! I read of hostilities towards people wearing masks. I just can’t imagine it.

But we are still lucky, no people close to us are sick and we have great access to video chat and can stay in close contact. The world is changing – it needs to change – but the path forward is unclear and the coming years will be difficult for everyone.

That’s a long way to say that it is a shockingly hard time right now for us, for you, for everyone. I hope that good will prevail and will contribute what I can towards making that happen.

I hope that all of you can find beauty in your life to give your attention to – a lovely bird singing, a soft dog to pet, a fragrant cup of tea and the sun rising in the East. Thank you for listening. Take care everyone.

Photo at the top is a developing guava (or guyaba)
Video is a couple of playful hummingbirds enjoying the sprinkler in our garden

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More about Nancy

I'm Nancy, a US expat living in San Antonio Tlayacapan, Jalisco after 11 years in Mazatlán, México.

    1. You expressed beautifully all I am thinking at the moment. One of my greatest frustrations is feeling powerless. I think those of us privileged to be educated are accustomed to feeling we might make a difference and being helpless is a challenge. Luckily a good internet connection is invaluable! Stay safe Nancy – and Paul, of course.

    1. Oh, Nancy, thank you so much for writing this! It’s exactly how I feel…and I am at such a loss as to what I can “do” – to help, to heal, to get through it all. Thanks for the encouragement and acknowledgment that we’re all in this together, wherever we are – and that we’ll come out of this, eventually, together.

      1. Hi Janet, Thank you! What hard times these are, we need to all hold each other close. I miss you amiga. Take care. xoxo

    1. Nancy, what a great post. I can’t see where the USA goes from here. I love the movement, and the large number of people speaking up, but I can’t see that it’s reached yet the tipping point needed for genuine change. I suspect there’ll be more adjusting around the edges, as so many times in the past. But I hope I’m wrong, and while I write to people in power, as I have to fake a USA address to do it, I’m really not as powerful as I’d like to be.
      And it’s awful that some people we previously liked are showing colours we’d rather not see. Sigh.
      Stay well both of you.

      1. Hi Wendy, I am happy to see that the movement has sparked protests and thinking about long ignored issues across the globe… but the anger and hatred I read about is so shocking and horrifying it is easy to become paralyzed. And all in the middle of a pandemic! Thank you for all you do, we all need to stick together. Take care sweetie. xoxo

    1. Thank you, Nancy, you express so well our feeling of helplessness but the wish for all of us to come through this eventually being healed. Feeling vulnerable to the virus as “older folk”, we have not joined in the protest marches, but I have been doing all I can to educate myself about Black and Indigenous History in the States and in Canada. I know so little. I have found the podcasts Stuff You Missed in History Class, and Secret Life of Canada from CBC radio to be most helpful. Like you, we are trying to stay close to family and friends and come through this together. Thank you again for expressing what so many of us are feeling. All the best to you and Paul.

      1. Hi Judith, So good you are educating yourself, I will check out those sources. I am so glad you and Ken are well, please take care amiga. xoxo

    1. Eloquent. Miss you guys. We’re doing fine here.

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